D and I have settled into the new reality, I believe. While neither of us is happy with the tumbles in our lives right now, it feels like we've at least accepted what's going on. And I suppose that's a key toward moving forward.
It's been a journey of starts and stops for me, as I try to become as supportive of D as I can as she comes to grip with menopause. Sometimes I give her space and "alone" time, and other times I spend with her just "hanging out." I don't mind either time if it's helpful to her.
I do get the feeling that sometimes I get it backwards, meaning I'm giving her space when she actually wants company, or I'm hanging out with her when she's craving some alone time, but we're working on that. I know it's incredibly hard for her to both feel the symptoms of menopause and try to "teach" me how to best be supportive.
But we're inching forward, day by day.
It's funny and almost irritating sometimes how my spanking gene refuses to lay low. D may have lost her kink, but not me. It's been persistent even as we both dealt with our challenges. I still want to spank. The urge ain't going to go away, nor is it going to lay low.
D and I talked about it for awhile last night. The bottom line (no pun intended, really!) is that, with D's encouragement and support, I am going to put some feelers out there for play dates who happen to live in our area.
We've both played privately at parties, and we both trust one another completely. So, for me to make a date to spank someone else outside of a party is, as we see it, a natural extension of party play. And it's something I have intended to do anyway, long before D's hiatus began.
I feel a bit awkward, however. I don't want to create a vibe for a play date that says, "Hey, let's play, but just until D gets better," after all. So let me make it clear: if I have the good fortune to meet someone who is on the same page with me in terms of spanking, she will become a good friend for as long as we both feel the chemistry. When D returns to Kinksville, as I believe she will, I will continue to spank others, as I have at parties.
By the way, for the curious, this new adventure is not about sex. It's about spanking. From funishment to punishment, from role playing to "just because." I am NOT looking for a sexual relationship.
I know, I know - the debate about whether spanking is sexual goes on and on. That's for another post. I know the differences, I know where they overlap, and I'm confident that one does not have to lead to the other.
So, we'll see what happens. I'm going to encourage any potential play dates to contact D before we meet, if they want a "reference," and to check out my story as well. They can email her, phone her, or even meet for coffee. Neither of us have anything to hide.
Meantime, it's 7:30 a.m. and time to get started with another day. See you down the line!